a total spoiled brat

A spoiled brat.. That's the exact words which can really describe myself. Seemed to be strong and though from the outer side, but weak in the inside.

Always managed to be strong in front of everyone and in any situation, and able to did it with the help of a shell called parents. Everyone and even my friends here were all being tricked by me. I could play my role so wonderfully.

The so-over-confident me then thought of going somewhere else to get out from the shell because she thought she was strong enough after this whole time living in a shell. But everything tourned out to be a boomerang for her.

Tried being a mature and independent girl, she looked for something fun that also gives her some fund. And then, as you can guess, it's time for the boomerang to fly back to the owner..

Found out that the 'something' is not fun and me as a total spoiled brat. Head is full on how to handle and finish it everyday. Everytime before I go to sleep and everytime when I wake up. Need some help right now... The old shell is too far to reach and still don't have a new one right now. Found someone who I thought I can trust and lean on and gives me help, but he just thought that a spoiled brat must be punished for everything she had done.

He had no mercy. He isn't even willing to help me. He's just saying that I have to be brave and do everything all along. He just thought I'm being spoiled at him everytime I asked for help. He makes the situation worse.

I do really need help. I'm spoiled.. YES I AM. I want to change myself, but I need help. Don't leave me alone like a blind guy in the middle of the street. I don't want always asking for help to everyone, but at least help me for this time. Help me reduce the problems in my head so I can think clearly, and finally solve the big problem. I need time.. I can't change immediately!

Huh.. once again, what a total spoiled brat I am.. Just yelling and complaining.. Even at this time, when there is no one to listen.. Such a useless..